Lisa Squared Part One
By
Graham Dawson
For the reader:
This script is ultimately intended to become a
Comic strip at Simpsons NetComix.
netcomix.cjb.net
During the script, there will be several
occasions when someone’s name is prefixed with a
P. or an F. P. means Past and F. means Future.
Cast List:
Future time (or the present depending on your
point of view):
Lisa Simpson-Carter:
Age = 31. In this setting, Lisa has roughly
shoulder length hair.
Matthew Carter:
Lisa’s hubby. Looks suspiciously like a certain
actor from “Friends”
Jane Simpson-Carter:
Lisa’s eldest daughter, she is a cross of Lisa’s
and Bart’s personalities. Doesn’t sound like
Lisa, though. Age = 11. (And yes, she is named
after a certain sister... read on).
Bart Simpson-Carter JR:
A lot like Lisa in character (intelligent etc.),
but with some of Bart’s worse traits. (Bart JR,
BJ) Age = 8
Bart Simpson:
Guess who. Age = 33 ish. (F. Bart during
narratives)
Jessie Simpson:
AKA Jessica Lovejoy. She and Bart were married
soon after Lisa’s wedding (or the time frame
therein). Age = Similar to Bart.
Maggie Simpson:
The eternally silent kid sister. Age = 23 (ish)
The past/present cast from the future/present’s
past. (Non regular cast members only):
Susanna Jane Simpson:
Lisa’s long lost twin sister. She has longer
hair than Lisa does, sort of like Lisa’s Wedding,
only not quite so long. Generally a more laid
back version of Lisa.
Doctor Olbermann:
Slightly maniacal research employed by Mr Burns.
As I haven’t seen every episode of the Simpsons,
I’m not sure if he appears outside (the official)
Simpsons Comics, but here he is anyway.
Günther:
Olbermann's assistant.
ACT ONE:
EXTERIOR- SOUTH YEARDLEY DRIVE- DAY
Caption “Capital City 2028”. It is early
afternoon. A sign in the background reads Otto
cab co, Capital City division. A red Chevy pulls
into the driveway of a particularly large house.
Cut to:
INTERIOR- LARGE HOUSE- AT THAT MOMENT
A phone rings in the background. The view pans
across A Nobel Prize, Several Pulitzers, an OBE,
some musical trophies, a “Capital City Academy of
Music – Lecturer of the month” award, dated
April, May and June 2023, a large fireplace and
several Simpson Family pictures. The door
slams.
LISA
(OS) MATT, can you get that?
MATT
(OS, MUFFLED) I’m kinda busy right
now.
LISA
(OS yells) Dammit, MATT!
Footsteps can be heard moving through the house.
The camera pans across the room and zooms through
a doorway, revealing a spacious kitchen. A
vidphone sits on the worktop, ringing. LISA,
looking a lot older, comes through the opposite
door and runs for the phone. She picks up the
receiver.
LISA
Hello? Oh hi Maggie. How’s London?
Uh-huh and how are you? – Yes the
kids are fine – Yes and Matt. – Uh-
huh. You are? Honey that’s great.
Who’s the lucky man then.
Lisa’s two children, JANE aged 9 and BART JR (BJ)
aged 7, enter from the same door as Lisa. Jane
vaguely resembles Lisa, except with pale blue
hair. As for Bart JR... well. Lisa cups her
hand over the mouthpiece
LISA
Hey kids, come say hello to your Aunt
Maggie.
Lisa turns the vidscreen on and points it at the
kids.
JANE/BJ
Hi Aunt Maggie.
Onscreen, MAGGIE waves. She tries to speak but
there is no sound.
LISA
(To Maggie) Oh sorry Maggie, I’ve
been meaning to get that fixed. (To
kids) You two run along now. Oh and
Jane? I want a word with you later.
BJ
(Just like the other Bart) Sounds
like some-ones in trouble.
JANE
Quit it Brat!
BJ
MOM she called me Brat again!
LISA
Jane, will you stop teasing your
little brother!
JANE
Well sor-ry!
BJ
(Running from the room) I’ve got the
computer first!
JANE
What – no WAY!
Jane chases BJ from the room.
LISA
(To Maggie) Now where were we...?
Before Lisa can continue, MATT interrupts her.
MATT
(OS, yells) LISA! Have you seen the
towels?
LISA
(Annoyed, Yells) They’re in the
linen closet. (To MAGGIE) Look, I’m
sorry Maggie, I’ll have to go – Yeah
sure you can come over. – Oh I don’t
know... Tonight?!? But you’re... oh
by shuttle. – Bart? – I suppose he
could come. – Yes. You... Uh-huh,
you too. See you tonight then. –
Ye... No I don’t think so. – Bye
Maggie. Yes. – Bye.
Lisa replaces the receiver, turns and shudders.
LISA
Ooh, she never stops talking!
Cut to:
INTERIOR- FIRE ROOM- LATER.
It is evening. LISA, MATT and MAGGIE are in the
room talking. Matt is by the fireplace holding a
beer. Lisa and Maggie are sat opposite facing
each other in easy chairs. The discussion
centres around Maggie’s Fiancé.
MATT
A Hells Angel, huh? Any idea what
Marge would say about that?
Maggie moves to speak, but the doorbell
interrupts her.
LISA
I’ll get that.
Cut to:
HALLWAY
MATT
(OS, with echo) So when are they
letting Marge out anyway?
Lisa opens the door to find Bart, holding a photo
album.
LISA
BART, You made it!
BART
Hey, hey, calm down Lis. Springfield
isn’t that far from Capital City. So
how’s Matt and the kids?
Bart and Lisa move back towards the fire-room.
LISA
They’re fine, the kids are over at
Michelle’s. But how are you? We’ve
barely spoken since you started law
school.
BART
Not so good really. My wife left me.
LISA
Again? That must be, what, five
times now.
BART
Seven. (Lisa stares at him) Hey,
these things happen.
Cut To:
FIRE ROOM
LISA and BART enter the room. MAGGIE is toying
with a Rubicks Cube. MATT is nowhere to be seen.
BART
Hey Maggie, how’s life at the worst
college this side of the equator.
Maggie opens her mouth in shock and reaches under
her jacket.
LISA
(Nervous laugh) Maggie, have you seen
Matt anywhere?
Maggie points to the kitchen, looks defiantly at
Bart and sits down.
BART
So who’s this Michelle again?
LISA
She’s my old secretary, from the
academy. Surely you remember her?
BART
Oh yeah, The robot babe. She’s a
fox!
LISA
(SOTTO) And you wonder why Jessie
keeps leaving.
BART
What?
LISA
Nothing. (To Maggie) What exactly is
he doing in there?
Maggie shrugs and returns to her cube. Her hands
blur as she completes it in about two seconds
then tosses onto the table.
MATT
(OS) I’m just getting some more
drinks. What does... (Matt’s head
pops around the door) What does Bart
want? Beer?
BART
No. Orange juice, thanks Matt. (To
Lisa and Maggie) You know, we should
get together more often.
Matt disappears for a moment, then returns with
the drinks. Bart spreads out on the couch,
placing the Photo album on the table. Matt picks
it up.
MATT
(To Bart) What’s this?
BART
It’s an old family album. I found it
in the attic at home.
Bart sips his drink as Matt begins flipping
through the book.
BART
(To Lisa) You should take a look in
there Lis.
Lisa moves over to Matt’s side. Matt flips some
pages, then stops.
MATT
Hey who’s this?
Cut To:
Looking at the album over MATT and LISA’S
shoulders. Matt points to a picture of the SUZY
and P. LISA, aged eight. Suzy is wearing a
baseball shirt and cap. Lisa takes the photo
from the book.
MATT
She looks just like you.
LISA
That... That is, or was, my twin
sister Suzy.
Cut To:
The view changes back to show all of them.
MATT
I didn’t know you had a twin sister.
LISA
I don’t like to talk about her much.
Maggie puts down her drink and looks
questioningly at Bart. He leans forwards.
BART
(To Maggie) Didn’t you know about
Suzy?
Maggie shakes her head.
BART
(Surprised) You mean no one told you?
MATT
(To Lisa) You wanna tell us the
story then?
BART
Yeah come on Lis. Maggie here wants
to know too.
LISA
Well, I guess I could. Might as well
sit down first.
Lisa sits next to Bart on the couch. Matt takes
one of the chairs.
LISA
I guess it must have been nearly
thirty years ago now. It actually
starts right back when I was born.
DREAM SEQUENCE FADE TO:
EXTERIOR- KWIK E MART- DAY
It is about midday. MARGE’S car pulls into the
car park and MARGE steps out.
LISA
(OS) Suzy was taken from mom soon
after birth, and I guess mom thought
she was dead. Of course she found
out different about eight years
later.
Cut To:
INTERIOR- KWIK E MART- AT THAT MOMENT
APU is wiping down the counter when MARGE enters.
He stops as he sees her.
MARGE
Morning Apu.
APU
Ah good morning Mrs Simpson. Have
you come here to find your daughter?
Marge stops in her tracks.
MARGE
Bart isn’t... Wait. Did you say
daughter? Lisa’s here?
APU
Yes I did. I think I last saw her
reading comics behind isle three.
Apu points to the isle, which is empty.
APU
At least, she was a moment ago.
MARGE
Are you sure it was Lisa? It’s not
like her at all.
APU
(Indignant) Of course I am sure. I
never forget a face.
MARGE
Well if it was Lisa, She’s in big
trouble.
Marge storms out of the building, slamming the
door on the way out.
APU
What if, it was definitely her. Oh
now I am talking to myself.
The door bangs and Marge storms back in again.
She walks past Apu into the store. Apu cringes
at several loud crashing noises. He watches in
shocked silence as Marge walks back to the
counter, pays and leaves.
APU
Umm, thank-you, I think.
Cut To:
HIGH STREET- LATER
>From inside her car, MARGE sees SUSANNA, (She is
wearing grey pants and a pale blue T-shirt)
entering the music store.
MARGE
(Confused) Lisa?
Marge pulls over to the curb, half a block down.
Cut To:
INTERIOR- SPORTS STORE- AT THAT MOMENT
SUZY wanders around the store, fascinated by
everything she sees. She stops in front of a
baseball display. An ASSISTANT appears as if
from nowhere.
ASSISTANT
Hiya little lady. You interested in
baseball?
SUZY
(Lisa) I suppose so.
ASSISTANT
Ever played?
SUZY
No.
ASSISTANT
Well, come here. I’ll show you how.
The Assistant grabs a glove and ball, and guides
Suzy to the back of the store, where a practice
court has been set-up.
ASSISTANT
Okay. Do you know the rules? (Suzy
shakes her head) Well basically you
have to hit this little ball as hard
as you can towards the pitcher. Now
you just grab a bat, and I’ll be the
pitcher, okay?
SUZY
Okay.
Suzy gets a bat from a pile of to one side. The
ASSISTANT stands on his mound and gets ready.
ASSISTANT
Ready? Cos here it comes.
The Assistant pitches under-arm to Suzy, who
whacks it straight back at him, hitting him on
the head. He falls over.
ASSISTANT
Oww! (Rubs his head) Okay, maybe I
should have said OVER the pitcher.
He gets up and pitches again. Suzy hits the ball
into the rear wall. It hits with a loud bang.
The Assistant goes to get the ball as MARGE
appears.
ASSISTANT
(OS) Hey, that’s quite a dent.
You’re pretty strong for a second
grader.
The Assistant comes back and sees Marge
ASSISTANT
(To Marge) Can I help you?
MARGE
No, thanks. (TO SUZY- annoyed) Lisa
you’re coming with me
Before SUZY can speak, MARGE grabs her hand and
drags her from the store.
Cut To:
Close up on the storefront. The door opens,
revealing MARGE and SUZY. Suzy struggles against
Marge’s grip as she is dragged down the steps.
MARGE
Now, young lady. You have a lot of
explaining to do. I want to know why
you’re not in school, what you’re
doing here and why you’re such a
mess.
Marge folds her arms and glowers at Suzy.
SUZY
(Puzzled) Who are you?
MARGE
Don’t play with me Lisa. I want
answers.
SUZY
But my name’s not Lisa, its Susanna.
MARGE
This isn’t funny Lisa.
SUZY
But I’m not...
MARGE
NO. I don’t want to hear it. Get in
the car, we’re going straight to
Principal Skinner.
SUZY
(Scared) No please, not the
Principal.
MARGE
In the car NOW!
Reluctantly, Suzy gets in the car, followed by
Marge. A man wearing dark glasses exits the
store as Marge and Suzy drive off.
MATT
(OS) I don’t understand why she was
so scared of Principal Skinner.
Cut to:
FIRE ROOM- NIGHT
MATT and LISA are sat on the couch; BART is sat
on a chair opposite. MAGGIE comes in from the
kitchen, carrying a tray of drinks, which she
sets down on the coffee table.
LISA
(To Bart) Another orange juice? Are
you feeling okay?
BART
Oh yeah. Apart from a swollen liver,
I’m perfectly fine.
LISA
Swollen liver?
BART
Yup. The doctor said I couldn’t
drink any alcohol for three months.
Only five days to go now, and I can
drink like a hog.
LISA
SO it wasn’t because you were
driving?
BART
Well... there is that too, yes.
LISA
Heh, well anyway. It turns out she
spent her whole life in this place
called the institute...
Cut To:
THE CAR- AT THAT MOMENT
MARGE is staring straight ahead, frowning but
also slightly confused. She occasionally gives
SUZY a sideways glance. Suzy is sat in the
passenger seat looking around, scared.
LISA
(OS) The one constant in her life had
been fear of the institute’s owner,
known only as the Principal.
Marge becomes increasingly annoyed by Suzy’s
fidgeting.
MARGE
Will you stop that! What’s with you
anyway?
SUZY
(Sullen) Like you don’t know.
MARGE
Humour me.
SUZY
Look lady, the once I'm in the
Principal’s office, I probably wont
come out alive.
MARGE
Lisa please don’t exaggerate. I know
Principal Skinner is strict but...
SUZY
Skinner?
MARGE
Principal Skinner... At the school?
SUZY
School?
They arrive at Springfield elementary.
MARGE
The Elementary school. Oh never
mind, we’re here now.
Cut To:
Outside the school, MARGE steps from the car just
as the recess bell rings.
MARGE
(To Suzy) Come on. We’re going ins-
She spots LISA on the playing field.
MARGE
(Confused) Lisa (looks at Suzy)
But... Suzy?
SUZY
Are you all right? (Spots Lisa)
Hey, she looks just like me.
Marge turns to Suzy, tears in her eyes.
MARGE
Oh Lord Suzy, it’s true.
She hugs Suzy tightly and chokes back her tears.
MARGE
My baby, I thought I’d lost you
SUZY
You mean you’re my mom?
MARGE
Yes. I – I thought you were dead.
I’m so sorry.
Suzy looks over Marge’s shoulder and points at
Lisa.
SUZY
Who’s that?
MARGE
What? (Turns to look) Oh. That’s
your sister, Lisa.
SUZY
(Awe struck) Wow, I have a sister?
Is THAT why you called me Lisa?
MARGE
We’d better go inside, I’ll explain
it there.
Cut To:
SKINNERS OFFICE- LATER.
PRINCIPAL SKINNER is reading reports at his desk.
There is a knock at the door.
SKINNER
Come in.
Skinner stands as MARGE enters.
SKINNER
Ah, Mrs Simpson. Please, sit. (Both
sit) Now, is there anything I can do
for you?
MARGE
Uh, yes. Could you call Lisa and
Bart up here, please?
SKINNER
Yes of course. (Reaches for the
mike) Is anything wrong?
MARGE
No, I just want to speak to them,
that’s all.
SKINNER
Very well (activates the mike). Lisa
Simpson and Bart Simpson please
report to my office immediately.
Cut to:
FOURTH GRADE CLASSROOM- AT THAT MOMENT
BART and the rest of the children stare at the PA
speaker in the corner of the room. MRS KRABAPPEL
looks up from her book at BART.
KRABAPPEL
Well Bart. What are you waiting for?
BART
Besides the fact that I didn’t do
anything yet, (Looks at his watch)
he’s at least an hour early.
KRABAPPEL
(Sarcastic) Well congratulations
Bart. You’ve just set a new record.
Bart gets up from his chair and leaves the room.
Krabappel continues teaching.
Cut To:
OUTSIDE SKINNERS OFFICE
LISA is stood nervously outside the office as
BART walks up. He frowns when he sees Lisa.
BART
Hey Lis. What are you doing here?
LISA
I wish I knew. It can’t be pleasant
if it involves you though.
A mobile phone rings. Lisa and Bart stand,
staring at each other, as it rings a few more
times.
LISA
Bart?
BART
Yo.
LISA
Your phone?
BART
(Realising) Oh yeah.
Cut To:
FIRE ROOM- AT THAT MOMENT
Everyone is in pretty much the same position.
MAGGIE is halfway through building the Taj –
Mahal from a deck of cards. BART fishes his
cellphone from his pocket and flips it open.
BART
Y’ello. Oh hi Jessie. Yeah I’m at
Lisa’s. Uh-huh.
MATT
(SOTTO to Lisa) Jessie?
LISA
(SOTTO) His wife, remember?
MATT
Oh, yeah. (Frowns) Which one?
BART
(To Jessie) Where are you anyway? –
Where? – What are you doing in a bus
depot? – No, I only have enough gas
to get home. – Yes. Look Jessie – I
know, but couldn’t you get a bus? –
Uh-huh. Okay, I’ll come and get you.
I’ll just have to see if I can get
some on the way down.
Maggie begins to take off her jacket. Lisa looks
at her inquiringly.
LISA
Is that a gun you’re wearing?
Maggie quickly puts her jacket back on and
fastens the zipper.
LISA
That’s what I thought.
BART
Just a second. (To LISA) Lis?
(Pause) Lisa!
LISA
Huh?
BART
Is it okay if I bring Jessie here for
the night? She doesn’t want to come
home just yet, but she ran out of
cash.
LISA
I dunno. Matt?
MATT
Wha... oh. Yeah, why not. Hell,
someone’s got to drink that twelve-
pack I laid in for.
BART
Thanks Matt. (To Jessie) Okay,
Jessie? Yeah I’m coming right over.
– No, you can stay with Lis. – Yeah.
Bye now. I love you too. (BART
closes the phone and stands up)
Well, looks like I’ve gotta go. I’ll
probably be about an hour.
MATT
Hey, no problem. Dinners gonna take
that long anyway.
BART
Well I guess I’ll see you in an hour
then (To Lisa, who stands). Don’t
worry, I can find my own way out
fine.
LISA
Actually, Bart, I was going to the
kitchen to start dinner.
Lisa walks out of the room.
BART
(Sarcastic) Oh, I’m so sorry Senator
Carter. May I never wrong you again.
(To Matt) See you later Matt.
LISA
(OS, Good humoured) Get out of here
Bart.
MATT
Later.
Bart leaves the room. The front door slams a
moment later.
LISA
(OS) Hey Maggie, wanna come and give
me a hand?
The model collapses under Maggie’s hands. She
throws down the two cards she is holding and
joins Lisa in the kitchen.
Cut To:
END PART A (not act one, since this is a comic.)
PART B:
DINING ROOM – NIGHT
It is early evening. BART, JESSIE, MAGGIE and
LISA are sat around the table. Matt stands
behind Lisa, cuddling her. Everyone is laughing,
except Maggie, who merely smirks and plays with
her fork.
MATT
(To Maggie) Man, you mean that fella
actually thought he was swimming?
Maggie nods and grins
BART
Unbelievable!
Lisa looks up at Matt.
LISA
Now Matt, shouldn’t you be watching
the dinner?
MATT
Yeah the dinner – The DINNER!
Matt bolts from the room. Bart sniffs the air as
the door opens.
BART
Damn that smells good. I haven’t had
a decent home cook meal since...
Hell, I can’t even remember!
Jessie looks at Bart, aghast.
JESSIE
Are you saying you don’t like my
cooking?
BART
That microwave soy slop we have at
home isn’t cooking, it’s barely worth
calling it food!
JESSIE
Well if that’s how you feel then I’m
leaving.
BART
You already did, remember?
JESSIE
But I... D’OH!
Lisa clears her throat, and looks threateningly
at Bart and Jessie. The doorbell rings.
MATT
(OS) I got it!
BART
Sorry Lis. I guess I just get
carried away sometimes.
LISA
(Frustrated) Well just, (waves her
hands) just drop it. Okay? (To
Jessie) BOTH of you. You do know
that all soy products were banned
last month.
BART/JESSIE
Really?
BART
Why?
LISA
I dunno. I would imagine it was some
sort of health scare-
BART
Heh, mad bean disease.
LISA
-BUT, those self-serving morons in
the senate waited for my day off
before passing the bill.
BART
Don't forget Lis, for five days of
the week you *are* one of those self-
serving morons.
LISA
(MARGE) Hrrmmm.
JESSIE
So what will you be eating then?
(Wry) I mean you can’t be giving up
vegetarianism, can you?
LISA
No. (Dubious) Matt said he found me
the perfect substitute. It’s called
Oat Meat or something...
Jane and BJ walk into the room. They run
forwards when they see Bart
BJ/JANE
Uncle Bart!
BART
Hey, how’s my favourite nephew?
Bart stands up.
BJ
I’m your only nephew sir.
BART
I knew that, (To Jane) and Jane.
You’re so... big!
JANE
Yeah whatever... Is that beef I can
smell?
LISA
Uh... yes. Don’t worry though, Dad
stocked up on your favourite pizza’s
last week.
JANE
Well if it’s all the same, I’d rather
go to my room until after dinner.
LISA
Fine with me, but don’t go using the
(Jane bolts from the room) ... phone.
BART
She’s just like you were at that age.
LISA
She is not! I never used the phone
without asking first!
BART
Whatever you say Lis. (To BJ) We know
what the real story is, huh BJ?
LISA
Bart, what have you been telling him?
BJ stifles a laugh and runs from the room.
BART
Nothing at all Lis.
JESSIE
Don't worry Lisa, I’ve got stuff on
Bart that you wouldn’t believe!
Matt comes back into the room, carrying a large,
covered platter. Jessie and Bart sniff
appreciatively.
MATT
Hey hey hey! Dinner is served.
Matt lays the platter on the table and removes
the lid.
MATT
You know it took me five hours to
find a store that sold real meat.
Not that I mind eating that soya
stuff but...
LISA
Aren’t you forgetting someone Matt?
MATT
What? Oh, yeah. I’ll be right back.
Matt runs from the room, returning a moment later
with a smaller platter.
MATT
Enjoy your oat-meat.
Matt sits down next to Lisa, whilst everyone else
grabs a rib. Lisa tries a forkful of her “Oat-
Meat”. She chews a few times, screwing her face
up, and swallows.
LISA
Could you pass the salad please
Jessica? And the pepper.
Jessie passes the items to Lisa, who proceeds to
shake the entire contents of the pepper pot onto
her meal.
MATT
(Mouth full) So Lis. (Swallows) When
are you gonna quit holdin out on us.
Lisa tries another forkful of her meal.
LISA
(SOTTO) I’m gonna start eating fish.
(Normal) What?
MATT
The story, man!
LISA
Oh, yeah. Where was I up to?
BART
We were just about to go inside
Principle Skinners office.
LISA
That’s right.
DREAM SEQUENCE FADE TO:
OUTSIDE SKINNERS OFFICE
It is the past again. Lisa and Bart are stood
outside the door to Principle Skinners office.
F. LISA
(OS) You’d better switch your phone
off Bart.
F. BART
(OS) Gotcha. Gee’s, do I remember
this part!
A small beep emanates from somewhere off screen.
LISA
(To Bart) So now what do we do?
BART
Well we sure as hell don’t stand
around out here all day.
Bart opens the door and walks in. Lisa watches
as the door closes behind him.
BART
(O.S. Yells.) AYE CARAMBA!
MARGE
(OS) No Bart, WAIT!
Bart comes rushing out of the room, terrified.
He sees Lisa and runs down the hall, screaming.
LISA
(Worried) Bart? What’s the matter?
PRINCIPAL SKINNER walks through the door.
SKINNER
Bart Simpson get back here this
instant. I... (Spots LISA) Good
Lord, an impostor! (Yells) They’ve
infiltrated the base. Sound the
alarm.
Skinner turns and dives into a ventilation shaft,
just as MARGE comes to the office door. She
watches him disappear.
SKINNER
(OS from vent. Determined). Must...
reach... command centre.
MARGE
(SOTTO, Shaking her head) This isn’t
quite how it was meant to happen. (To
Lisa, sighs) Lisa, there’s someone
I’d like you to meet.
Marge walks back into the room, returning a
moment later with Suzy.
LISA
(Gasps)
MARGE
This is your sister, Susanna.
SUZY
Hi.
LISA
Sister? But she... I... we...
(Frustrated) Moom!
MARGE
(Sighs) It’s a long story Lisa.
LISA
(Neutral) I’ve got plenty of time.
MARGE
Well, we’d better find Bart first.
Marge, Lisa and Suzy walk off down the hall.
Cut To:
SIMPSON CAR- LATER
In the back of the car, BART and LISA are staring
at SUZY, who looks out of the window. There is a
large gab between Suzy and B/L. After a while
she turns to look at them.
MARGE
So, uh, Suzy. Do you know where
you’ve been all this time?
SUZY
Well I don’t really... Bart stop it!
BART
Stop what?
SUZY
You’re staring at me.
BART
I wasn’t staring (looks at Lisa) were
you staring Lis?
Lisa turns her head without taking her eyes off
Suzy.
LISA
Oh no I wasn’t... I wouldn’t be... be
staring. (To Bart) Would you?
BART
No, of course not.
LISA
No.
Bart and Lisa continue to stare at Suzy. She
stares back for a while before folding her arms
and looking out of the window.
SUZY
(MARGE) Hrrmmmm!
There is silence for a while.
LISA
(To Marge) Mom, why don’t you tell us
how Suzy disappeared.
MARGE
Well, I don’t really like to think
about it but... okay (Pause) It came
as a bit of a surprise to find I was
expecting twins, and I wasn’t sure
how your father would cope. He
seemed to accept it though.
BART
I don’t remember anything about
twins.
MARGE
Well you were only two at the time.
Anyway, I gave birth to you two,
identical in every way. The only way
I could tell you apart was the blue
streak in Suzy’s hair. Doctor
Hibbert said it was a genetic thing.
LISA
Ooh, can I have a look?
SUZY
No!
MARGE
(Clears her throat) Are you even
listening?
Bart, Lisa and Suzy snap round to face her.
MARGE
Good. About a month after you were
born Suzy became ill. I don’t recall
what it was exactly, but to be safe
we took you both into the hospital
for checks.
HOSPITAL ROOM – BW SILENT
MARGE fusses over Lisa and Suzy in a cot.
MARGE
(OS) They kept you in overnight for
observation and I stayed as well. In
the middle of the night, this German
doctor burst into the room and took
Suzy.
HOSPITAL ROOM - NIGHT
OLBERMANN and GÜNTHER burst into the room, waking
Marge. Günther holds down Marge whilst Olbermann
picks up Suzy. Both run from the room.
MARGE
I tried to stop them, to get some
help but no one came.
THE PRESENT
MARGE
The next morning I was told that
she’d died... I didn’t know what to
do.
LISA
Oh Mom, that’s awful.
F.MATT
(OS) Yeah Lis, that’s awful. How did
she cope?
F. LISA
(OS) The same way she always coped.
F. MATT
(OS) Oh.
F.LISA
Although it was strange at first, we
soon got used to having Suzy around.
Cut To:
INTERIOR- TV ROOM- DAY
Caption “ Three months later”. It is early
afternoon. LISA and SUZY are lying in front of
the TV. Suzy is wearing a baseball cap and
shirt. A bat and Lisa’s Sax are resting on the
couch. The door slams.
F. LISA
(OS) At least, most of us did.
HOMER comes into the room.
LISA/SUZY
(W.O. looking up) Hi dad.
Homer screams and hides behind the doorframe. He
looks around the frame nervously.
HOMER
Will you two stop doing that!
LISA/SUZY
Doing what?
HOMER
Oooh! You’re doing it again!
Bart walks into the room.
BART
Hey chill-out Homer. It’s not as if
they’re Aunt Patty and Aunt Selma.
Lisa leans over to Suzy and whispers something to
her. Suzy nods and they both giggle.
HOMER
Hey you’re right.
BART
So Lis. You wanna go...
Bart’s words fade away as he sees Lisa and Suzy
staring at him a-la Patty/Selma
BART
Umm, Homer? (He tugs Homer’s sleeve)
HOMER
What.
BART
(Worried) Dad?
HOMER
(Annoyed) What!
Homer turns and shudders when he sees L and S.
LISA/SUZY
(Patty/Selma) Humph!
Bart and Homer grab each other and scream. S and
L roll around the floor, laughing uncontrollably
as MARGE runs in from the kitchen. She stops
short when she sees what’s happening.
MARGE
(SOTTO) What the... (To Homer)
Homer, I forgot to tell you, but
Patty and Selma are coming over for
dinner.
HOMER
(Worried) Oh no, that means there’ll
be four of them. What’ll I do?
BART
Well I have two suggestions. A, run
and B, hide.
HOMER
Good thinking boy.
Homer and Bart run from the room.
MARGE
What’s gotten into them? (To L and
S) All-right you two, I want this
house tidy for when your aunts get
here.
Suzy leaps up and runs for the door. She grabs
her bat on the way.
SUZY
Well-gotta-go-batting-practice-see-
y’all-later (door slams)
MARGE
What? (Lisa stands to leave) And
where are you going young lady?
LISA
Well... I guess I... umm (SOTTO) Come
on brain. There has to be something
you can do. What would Bart say in a
situation like this? (BRAIN) How
should I know, YOU never listen to
him (SOTTO) Oh, I... Aha! (Speaking)
Jazz club!
MARGE
Excuse me?
LISA
Yeah, yeah that’s it. I’m going to
an after school Jazz club.
MARGE
On a Saturday afternoon? In the
middle of summer no less!
LISA
(Nervous) He-he-he, yeah. (Pause) I
have to go now.
Lisa heads for the door. MATCH: View from the
hall. Marge stands behind Lisa. She lifts up
Lisa’s Sax.
MARGE
Aren’t we forgetting something.
Lisa cringes.
LISA
Yeah I... wouldn’t want to forget
that for my Jazz club. (Quieter)
Jazz...
Marge watches in silence as Lisa takes the sax
from her, then leaves the room. The door slams a
moment later.
Cut To:
EXTERIOR- EVERGREEN TERRACE- AT THAT MOMENT
SUZY is stood near the end of the drive, swinging
her bat around. LISA comes running out of the
house.
SUZY
Oh come on Lis, the sports hall
closes at three.
LISA
What?
Suzy runs of down the road, followed by Lisa, who
nearly trips on her strap.
Cut To:
SPORTS HALL- LATER
The reception to the sports hall leads opens up
onto the gym, where Rainier Wolfcastle and
Drederick Tatum can be seen sparring in the
background. Lisa and Suzy come in through the
door. MATCH: Close up of the desk. The
RECEPTIONIST turns as Lisa and Suzy approach.
RECEPTIONIST
May I help you children? Oh Susanna,
its you. I suppose you want your
usual cage.
SUZY
Thanks.
RECEPTIONIST
I’ll just get the key.
The Receptionist hands a receipt to Suzy. MATCH:
Looking into the Reception/Gym, over L and S’s
shoulders. Tatum is pummelling Wolfcastle
repeatedly.
LISA
I thought batting practice was just
an excuse.
SUZY
It was at first. But since I’ve got
my bat with me, I might as well hit
something.
LISA
Sounds reasonable.
Cut To:
Close up of reception desk. The Receptionist is
busy in the background. Suzy swings her bat
around her wrist.
RECEPTIONIST
Here we are. Cubicle six, you’ve got
half an hour.
The Receptionist hands over a key to Suzy.
MATCH: Looking into the Reception/gym.
Wolfcastle is spinning Tatum over his head,
yawning. Lisa and Suzy walk past, oblivious.
Cut To:
BATTING CAGE- LATER
A man wearing dark glasses (Olbermann) can be
seen in the background. Nearby, another man
(Günther) picks up a bat and loiters around the
entrance to the cage. LISA watches as SUZY
smashes ball after ball into the rear wall,
making several large dents. The machine pauses
for a second.
LISA
You’re pretty strong for an eight-
year-old.
SUZY
Come again?
LISA
Those dents you’ve made in the far
wall.
SUZY
I hadn’t actually thought about it.
And I don’t want to either.
LISA
But surely you...
SUZY
(Final) No. (Hits another ball) So
what’s with the horn?
LISA
Huh? (Looks down at her Sax) Oh, I
told mom I was going to a Jazz club
or... something.
Suzy stops her batting and faces Lisa.
SUZY
Mind if I have a go?
LISA
Sure, go ahead. I’m not gonna use
it.
Suzy walks out from the cage and picks up Lisa’s
Sax. She holds it uncertainly for a moment, then
looks at Lisa.
LISA
Okay I’ll show you. (Grabs Suzy’s
hands) You put your hands like this.
Now put the reed into your mouth and
push up against it with your tongue.
SUZY
(Mouth full) Like this?
LISA
Yes, now blow.
Suzy blows bum note.
SUZY
Ewwww!
LISA
(Giggles) It takes a little practice.
Why don’t you try again?
Suzy begins to play a tune. She quickly begins
to add more complicated riffs and melodies. Lisa
watches in amazement as she plays faster and
faster.
F. LISA
(OS) I couldn’t believe it. She
played beautifully. It had taken me
four years of practice to get where I
was, and she outplayed me after five
minutes. And then there was the
little matter of her swing. I knew
she wouldn’t react well to an open
question about it, so I had to try
and coax it out.
Suzy stops playing.
LISA
You uh, sure you’ve never played one
before?
SUZY
Never. We weren’t allowed any kind
of entertainment in... I... (Drifts
off)
LISA
Suzy? In where? What’s the matter?
Suzy breaks down crying. Lisa moves to comfort
her but is pushed away by Suzy.
LISA
Suzy please. You can tell me.
SUZY
(Crying) You wouldn’t understand.
There’s no way you could possibly
know what I’ve been through.
LISA
Well... tell me anyway. Sometimes it
helps to just talk.
SUZY
(Sniff) Well I guess... (Wipes her
eyes) I don’t really know where to
start.
LISA
You can start by telling me where
you’ve been for the past eight years.
SUZY
For as long as I can remember, I’ve
lived in a place called the
Institute. I can only clearly recall
a few things about it; the rest is
either vague or totally blank.
(Chokes)
LISA
Suzy?
SUZY
(Looks away) I’m alright... It’s
just so many bad memories...
LISA
Such as?
SUZY
Well, the guards for one thing.
There were one or two who were
friendly enough, but to most of them
we were just trouble.
LISA
You said we... there were others
there?
SUZY
Oh yeah. About 40, not including the
guards, split into two sections of
about 20 each. My section was mostly
involved in espionage, uh, stealing
information for the Principal. We
were left to wander around business
conferences and science fairs,
finding out as much as we could.
LISA
Wait a minute. How could you steal
information from these people?
You’re just a kid.
SUZY
Well that’s the beauty of it, you
see. No one suspects a child and all
I had to do was walk around and touch
people.
LISA
Touch them? You learn things by
touching people? (Suzy nods) I don’t
believe that that’s possible.
SUZY
How do you think I learned the Sax so
quickly?
LISA
Well I thought it was—
SUZY
You put your hands on mine, didn’t
you?
LISA
I... I suppose I did. (Pause) You
mean you could learn anything from
me, just by holding my hand? And you
didn’t tell me? I feel so, so
violated.
SUZY
If it makes you feel any better, you
were right about Ralph and Janey.
LISA
(Whinging) Suzy!
SUZY
(Defensive) I can’t help it! I’ve
only been doing it my entire life!
LISA
God help me for asking but how did
you escape?
SUZY
I was doing a trade fair in Capital
City and somehow managed to contact
the security team I was with. I
learned just enough to disable the
tracking device they had on me, and
then I lost myself in the crowd. By
the time they realised what had
happened I was safely on my way to
Springfield. They probably still
don’t know what happened.
MATCH: Close-up Olbermann. He takes out a small
device and starts fiddling with it. It beeps
twice.
MATCH: Suzy/Lisa.
LISA
Did you hear that?
SUZY
Hear what?
LISA
It sounded like a (Suzy begins to act
strangely) Suzy? Are you alright?
SUZY
No... I – Aaaahh!
Suzy grabs her head and collapses. Olbermann
runs up to her. One or two other people gather
around, including Günther.
LISA
Suzy? (Gets up and starts shaking
Suzy) Suzy wake up. (Aggravated)
Suzy! Come on, don’t do this to me!
OLBERMANN
(Germanic) Stand back, I’m a doctor.
(Leans over Suzy) Hmmm...
LISA
Hmm what do you mean hmm?
OLBERMANN
Subject appears to be suffering a
swelling of the cerebral cortex,
(Turns Suzy’s head sideways) very
serious. (He checks her pulse) Her
heart’s stopped (To Günther) You!
Call an ambulance immediately.
Günther runs out of the room.
LISA
(SOTTO, fast) She’s gonna die she’s
gonna die she’s gonna die she’s gonna
die she’s gonna die she’s gonna—
OLBERMANN
Be quiet! Nobody is going to die.
LISA
But you said it was –
OLBERMANN
(Agitated) No I didn’t! Now be
quiet!
Lisa stares at Olbermann momentarily, before
sitting down meekly. Moments later, an ambulance
can be heard arriving.
LISA
That was quick.
OLBERMANN
No it wasn’t.
Cut To:
EXTERIOR- SPORTS HALL- LATER
A small crowd has gathered as two medics wheel
SUZY to a waiting ambulance. OLBERMANN and LISA
follow them to the doors. Lisa watches for a
short while, then turns to leave.
OLBERMANN
Where are you going?
LISA
I’m going to phone my mom.
OLBERMANN
No!
LISA
But –
OLBERMANN
Gotten Himmel! You can phone her
from the hospital. Now stop wasting
my time and get in the ambulance.
Olbermann turns away and starts talking to one of
the medics. Lisa stares at him as she gets into
the ambulance.
MEDIC
(Harsh whisper) Wer das ist! (German,
subtitled) There was only supposed to
be one!
OLBERMANN
(German, Subtitled) Well evidently
she has a sister!
MEDIC
(German, sub; Warning tone) The
Principal won't like this.
OLBERMANN
(German, Sub) Actually, I think he
will... Get moving
F.LISA
(OS) I knew that there was something
wrong about them, but when I realised
that they were speaking German, it
was too late.
Cut to:
AMBULANCE
Olbermann gets into the ambulance with Lisa and
closes the door. The ambulance sets off with a
bump. Lisa watches Olbermann as he attaches
electrodes to Suzy’s chest and head.
LISA
What are you doing?
Olbermann ignores her and takes out the same
small device. He points it at Suzy and pushes
some buttons. She shudders and her eyes open
momentarily. The heart monitor begins beeping
rhythmically. Olbermann unplugs the monitor and
takes a syringe down from a shelf.
LISA
Why was that medic speaking German?
OLBERMANN
There’s no need to worry about that
now. Please, stay calm and you won’t
be hurt.
Olbermann removes the syringe cover and squirts
out some of the liquid.
LISA
What’s that for?
OLBERMANN
This? This is a sedative. It works
extremely fast.
LISA
But Suzy doesn’t need sedating.
OLBERMANN
No. But you do.
LISA
Wha–
Olbermann jabs the needle into her arm. She
immediately collapses, unconscious.
Cut To:
CLOSEUP LISA
LISA is slouched in an office chair, tied down by
her arms and legs. She begins to stir, then
awakens suddenly.
LISA
Suzy!
BURNS
(OS) Ah, it looks like our “guest” is
awake.
Lisa sits bolt upright up and looks around.
MATCH: BURNS OFFICE. BURNS, SMITHERS and
OLBERMANN gather around Lisa.
LISA
Mr Burns? What – (Gasps) you’re the
Principal!
BURNS
Smithers did you hear that? Is her
whole family this intelligent?
SMITHER
Uhh...
OLBERMANN
She does seem to possess a remarkable
mind but if she is to be of any use I
must start my tests immediately!
BURNS
Oh come now Doctor, I’m sure a little
chat wouldn’t hurt. (To Lisa) Your
sister is quite the little spy. I’ve
never had any of my assets out in the
field this long before, and the
information she’s providing is quite,
uh... informative.
LISA
Assets? What are you talking about?
BURNS
Oh it’s quite simple my dear. (He
begins pacing in front of the
monitors) All the things I own are
called assets. I own this power
plant, which makes it an asset. I
own the institute, which makes it an
asset. I own everything in the
institute, including your sister and
that makes her an asset. (Burns
turns and faces Lisa) And now I own
you.
LISA
WHAT! You can’t own me, or my
sister. We’re human beings, not some
commodity to be bought and sold.
Besides, my parents will come looking
for me.
BURNS
Oh your parents. I’d completely
forgotten about them. I'm sure a
suitable distraction can be arranged
for them, Smithers? If you would
deal with that please.
SMITHERS
Yes sir. (Turns to leave)
BURNS
Oh and Smithers? When you’ve
finished, send the family a bouquet
of flowers, with my personal
commiseration’s.
Burns walks behind his desk and presses a button.
A panel in the wall slides away and a GUARD walks
into the room.
BURNS
Now Miss Simpson, I had no intention
of selling you. There’s no market
for children these days. No I recall
that Doctor Olbermann had requested
to perform certain, experiments, on
your sister that I didn’t allow at
the time. I had other needs for her,
you see.
LISA
E-experiments?
BURNS
Hmm yes, it’s all very technical
something to do with (seems to
struggle) nano-technology. (To
Olbermann) Doctor, would you care to
explain?
OLBERMANN
If you insist, Mien Herr.
Olbermann approaches Lisa, who stares back
defiantly.
OLBERMANN
I believe that your “sister”
explained something of what she is,
ja?
LISA
Why are you doing this?
OLBERMANN
Answer my question!
LISA
Yes she did, now you answer mine.
OLBERMANN
Very well. I’m sure you know what a
nano-machine is? Microscopic robots
that can re-arrange matter at it’s
most basic level.
Olbermann begins pacing.
OLBERMANN
(Animated) I have been researching
this field for almost fifteen years.
With this technology, I can
manipulate the DNA of any individual,
alter their genetic code to produce
whatever I wanted.
LISA
If you can do all of this, then why
didn’t you use it to cu-?
OLBERMANN
You must be joking. I’d be putting
thousands of doctors out of business.
Besides, it’s boring. I wanted to
produce the ultimate spy, and with
the funding of Herr Burns I was able
to do so.
LISA
You do know that this is illegal.
BURNS
I’m beginning to tire of your
incessant prattling. (To guard) Have
her prepared and taken to a cell.
Then await further instructions.
The guard unties Lisa and pulls her from the
chair. They begin walking to where the panel
opened up earlier, the guard holding Lisa's arm
tightly. The panel opens.
LISA
You can’t do this to me.
BURNS
Oh? I thought I already had.
Goodbye Lisa, or should I say... 42.
(Begins to laugh maniacally)
BLACKNESS
Burns laughter fades away. There is a loud
buzzing noise and a door opens, faintly
illuminating a sterile cell. In the doorway, a
guard (ALEXI, Russian) holds LISA, who is wearing
a grey uniform. Behind Alexi is stood GÜNTHER,
holding a small gun. Alexi roughly throws Lisa
into the cell, where she lands badly and
whimpers.
ALEXI
Hey Günther, we have not used cell
for many years. Why now?
GÜNTHER
The doctor has this one on Section
two.
ALEXI
Ah! (To Lisa) Hear that little girl?
Doc has you for special project da?
Enjoy life while you still have it.
GÜNTHER
(Almost pleading) Alexi, she has
enough to worry about without your
sadist comments
Günther activates the door control, then both
guards turn and walk away.
ALEXI
You are new here, da?
GÜNTHER
So?
Lisa runs up to the door as it slams shut. The
cell is plunged into semi-darkness.
ALEXI
You learn soon enough, she is only
subject, after all.
The lights come on. Lisa crawls into the corner
of the cell and curls up. She begins to cry
softly.
<TO BE CONTINUED... >
Notes:
Well having now read the script, you may have
noticed one or two things. First and foremost,
although it is intended to be a comic, It is in
fact written as a screenplay... sort of. This is
how I originally envisioned Lisa^2 being
published, but I soon realised that this would
not be so. Of course, I had already started
writing the thing, so I couldn’t really change
the format without confusing myself.
Finally, I’d like to say thank-you to a few
people.
Steven Scott - for his excellent script, Lisa the
Telepath, and for letting me use said script in a
comic, and also for his input into this script...
Adam Pulver, of the Simpsons Fanscripts Central,
in advance of him posting this script...
Christina Nordlander – For her comments on the
script.
My brother, David, for not forcing me off the
computer in the evenings...
And finally, everyone who has written to
NetComix, telling me how much they like/hate me,
my ideas, want to kill my family etc.
Part two will come soon.
Lisa Squared Part Two
By
Graham Dawson
ESTABLISHING – SOUTH YEARDLEY DRIVE – NIGHT
CUT TO:
CLOSE LISA
LISA stares glumly into a coffee cup. The only
sound that can be heard is the fire crackling.
FIRE ROOM
LISA is sat near the fire; MAGGIE is sat near
her. MATT, BART and JESSIE are stood off to one
side.
CLOSE MATT/BART/JESSIE
MATT
I’ve never seen her like this before.
BART
I have, when she came back from that
place. She barely talked for a month
and she never told us what happened
either.
JESSIE
Well we have to do something.
MATCH: LISA. Matt walks up to Lisa and sits down
next to her.
MATT
Lis? (Pause) Lisa, talk to me.
Lisa sighs.
MATT
Lisa... It had to come out sooner or
later. You don’t want to end up
boarding with Marge now do you?
LISA
That’s not funny Matthew!
MATT
No it’s not, but it could very easily
happen if you don’t talk to me.
LISA
Well it’s just so... (Swallows) it’s
just so hard, thinking about what
happened to me.
MATT
(Consoling) Hey, hey. It’s alright
now-
LISA
(Upset) No it’s not. I lost my
sister and my mother because of
that... that place!
JESSIE
Your mother? But Marge is-
BART
As good as dead the state she's in.
In and out of mental institutions,
doped up on all kinds of drugs most
days. After that little "distraction"
Lisa talked about, she was never
quite the same.
CUT TO:
TV ROOM – NIGHT
It is evening. Bart is watching TV. Marge walks
into the room, muttering to herself.
MARGE
Where on earth are they? It’s just
not like Lisa to be out this late.
Those girls are in so much trouble...
Marge disappears into the kitchen. The doorbell
rings.
MARGE
(OS) That’s them!
Marge rushes through the room into the hall.
Bart watches her as she passes by.
CUT TO:
EXTERIOR - DOOR
MARGE opens the door.
MARGE
Lisa where... (Confused) Who are you?
MATCH: AGENT SPENDER. He holds up a badge.
SPENDER
Agent Spender, FBI ma’am. May I come
in?
MARGE
Uh... I suppose so.
PULL BACK TO ESTABLISHNG SHOT
Marge and Spender walk into the house and the
door closes. A few moments pass.
MARGE
(OS) NOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!!
Marge runs into the garden. MATCH: CLOSE MARGE.
She drops onto her knees crying. SPENDER walks
up behind her.
MARGE
Oh G**, Lisa... Suzy...
SPENDER
I’m sorry for your loss Mrs Simpson.
MARGE
They were so young.
SPENDER
We found them near the bridge they...
they wouldn’t have suffered very
long.
MARGE
No! No it can’t be possible!
Marge stands and faces Spender.
MARGE
How could you even know who it is?
There’s no way-
SPENDER
We found this on one of the bodies.
Spender holds up Lisa’s necklace. Marge takes
the necklace from Spender and examines it for a
moment.
MARGE
(Whispers) Lisa...
The hand holding the necklace drops to her side,
and Marge buries her face in the other.
SPENDER
I’m... sorry, Ma’am.
CUT TO:
WIDEANGLE LOW – EVERGREEN TERRACE
MARGE drops the necklace and collapses to the
ground, crying uncontrollably.
Cut To:
HALLWAY
A large, intimidating security door is set in the
wall directly opposite camera. GÜNTHER and a
GUARD drag LISA through the doors as they open.
Cut To:
LAB
Looking down a long room towards the door. Along
each wall there are a number of glass panels set
into the wall, about 4’ high. Behind many of the
windows vague, humanoid shapes can be seen.
GÜNTHER and the GUARD carry LISA along the room
and stop.
GÜNTHER
(To Guard) You may leave now.
MATCH: Close Lisa/Günther. The guard drops Lisa
and walks away. Lisa turns to Günther, then
looks around the room. In the window behind
them, a human form moves slightly.
LISA
What is this place?
Günther pauses, unsure of how to respond to
Lisa’s question.
GÜNTHER
This uh... this is the lab. (Pause)
Come.
Günther begins walking down the room and Lisa
follows him. As they pass the panels Lisa stares
at them intently. She stops in front of one and
moves closer.
GÜNTHER
What... what are you doing?
LISA
I’m looking.
GÜNTHER
But you can’t-
LISA
Can’t I?
GÜNTHER
But... But...
Lisa touches the glass.
LISA
(Sotto) It's cold...
Lisa pushes her face right up against the panel.
MATCH: BEHIND THE PANEL. Lisa wipes the
condensation off the glass and stares in. She
gasps and jerks backwards. MATCH: OUTSIDE.
Straight shot of the panel. Lisa is stood at the
bottom staring up. Behind the window is a young
teenaged girl who resembles Marge. Her skin is
pale and her eyes are closed. She is dressed in
a pale blue gown and her hair fans out in the
gentle currents within the chamber.
LISA
(Concerned) Mom?
GÜNTHER
No, that is not your mother.
LISA
But it looks just like her.
Günther glances round nervously.
GÜNTHER
That is because it is her sister.
Look.
Günther points to the side of the window. Lisa
looks closely to where he is pointing, finding a
label that reads “CASE-R CRYO-STASIS 08\24\1963-
BOUVIER-CST33//ANNA: 7XG.
GÜNTHER
It is an unusual genetic feature that
all the females born to your family
become twins.
LISA
All of them? Then what about Maggie?
GÜNTHER
Hmm... She must have been an
aberration, a genetic fluke if you
will. It happens now and again.
They stand in silence for a while.
LISA
Why is my m- I mean why is she in
here?
GÜNTHER
This is where we keep all the failed
experiments.
LISA
Failed experiments? She looks fine
to me.
GÜNTHER
She may look fine, but she isn't.
Her mind was wiped in an early
experiment. Without the cryo-stasis
tanks, none of these children would
survive more than a few hours.
LISA
That’s horrible! How can you... Why
do you keep them like this!
Günther and Lisa begin walking again.
GÜNTHER
I do not like what I do here, but it
is all that I know... all I have ever
known.
F.LISA
In that moment I realised that, deep
down, this was a man I could trust.
I wanted to find out more from him
but-
OLBERMANN
(OS) What is going on here! You were
meant to be in the lab ten minutes
ago. Günther!
OLBERMANN walks into view.
LISA
You! Why have you done this!
OLBERMANN
(Chastising) Günther how many times
must I tell you not to talk with the
subjects? They are not equals; they
are tools to be commanded.
LISA
I am not a tool!
OLBERMANN
Silence!
Olbermann takes a controller from his coat.
OLBERMANN
You know what this is? Only two of
them exist within the entire
institute. The Principal controls
one. I have this slightly less
functional one.
GÜNTHER
Sir? Didn’t you just say-
OLBERMANN
I am instructing her in protocol, not
having a friendly chat! (Sighs) You
are still young, you will understand
soon.
Olbermann points the controller at Lisa and
pushes a single button. Lisa falls over onto her
back.
LISA
(Distressed) What have you done to
me? I can’t move!
OLBERMANN
I don’t believe I told you before,
but every subject in the institute
has a control device implanted
directly into “its” brain. It allows
me to affect any part of the nervous
system, inflicting whatever
punishment is required. (Menacing) Do
not disobey me again or I will use it
to the fullest extent possible.
Cut To:
BUNK ROOM (for want of a better description)
In a long thin room, with several small bunks
along one wall, a group of children are gathered
in a huddle. (<Identified by their last name and
a number. Please bear in mind that they will NOT
be like their namesakes in character> MUNTZ-4;
VAN HOUTEN-5 <Milhouse, Wears wraparound glasses,
the left lens of which is blacked out>; POWELL-15
<Janey>; WIGGUM-12 <Female>). All the boys have
their hair cropped short, whilst the girls have
theirs tied back in a ponytail. None of them are
speaking, instead they “think” to each other
electronically (EV).
MUNTZ
(EV) That can’t be possible Wiggum.
Nine is gone.
WIGGUM
(EV) But I swear I saw her. She-
(Whispers aloud) She came *out* of
the Principals office.
VAN-HOUTEN
(EV) You mean she was brought out.
WIGGUM
(EV) No, she was still active if
that’s what you mean. She looked
different though. Kinda-
A door at the end of the room cracks open and a
GUARD tosses SUZY into the room. The group waits
for the door to close before rushing to her.
Suzy gets up and brushes off her uniform as they
gather around.
VAN HOUTEN
Nine! (EV) You’re back.
POWELL
(EV) Where have you been? Twelve
said she saw you leaving the
Principal’s office.
SUZY
(EV) What? I haven’t been anywhere
near there. (Aloud) Can the guards
still monitor us?
MUNTZ
(EV) Yes they... (Aloud) What was
that?
SUZY
(EV) I downloaded a virus into the
system. We should be able to talk
freely now.
VAN HOUTEN
(EV) A v- (Harsh whisper) A virus,
are you crazy!
SUZY
(Aloud) Eh, they’ll never know.
Cut To:
SECURITY ROOM
Several Guards are sat staring at monitors.
GUARD1
Sir, we may have a virus.
GUARD2
Let me see.
The guard looks at the monitor. MATCH: Monitor.
On screen a message reads “Twenty-two points,
plus triple word score, plus 50 points for using
all my letters, games over I'm outta here!”
MATCH: Guards.
GUARD2
That’s strange, the anti-virus
programs should have kicked in by
now.
GUARD1
Should I call the Principal?
GUARD2
Yes.
Cut To:
BUNK ROOM
SUZY
It's a little trick I learned
outside.
MUNTZ
(EV) Why were you in the Principal’s
office?
SUZY
(EV) I’ve already said I was nowhere
near there. It must have been
Lisa... Oh, I hope she’s alright.
POWELL
(EV) Who’s Lisa?
SUZY
(EV) My sister.
MUNTZ
(EV, Unbelieving) You... You have a
sister?!
SUZY
(EV) Not just a sister, I have a
whole family outside the institute.
WIGGUM
(EV) Do any of us have a... family?
SUZY
(EV) I, uh, I suppose... (SOTTO) What
am I supposed to tell them, that
their families are a bunch of jerks?
SUZY’S BRAIN
Quiet, they might hear you.
SUZY
(SOTTO) Oh, like you’re any use.
POWELL
(Quiet to Muntz) What’s a jerk?
Muntz shrugs.
VAN HOUTEN
(EV) Why don’t you just start at the
beginning and work from there?
SUZY
(EV) Do you want the long version or-
(Gasp)
MUNTZ
(EV) Nine?
FLASH CUT: DISTANT. Lisa strapped to a Medical
Exam chair.
FLASH: CLOSE LISA. Lisa screams.
FLASH: OLBERMANN’S FACE
FLASH: BLACKNESS
LISA
(OS, echo) Suzy, help me!
CLOSE ON SUZY
SUZY
Lisa...
MUNTZ
(EV) Nine. (Aloud) What’s with you
Simpson?
SUZY
(EV) She’s in trouble. We have to
help her!
WIGGUM
(EV) Who!
SUZY
(EV) My sister! We have to help her
now!
MUNTZ
(EV) Hold it. There’s no way we
could help her, you don’t even know
where she is. I mean, we can't even
leave this room.
A loud klaxon alarm suddenly blares out from all
around the room. The doors at the end of the
room slide open with a loud screech and a voice
begins speaking over the PA.
PA
(TERRI HATCHER?) Warning. Emergency
fire procedures are now in force.
All security personnel report to
assigned duty stations. This is not
a drill.
MUNTZ
Did you do that?
SUZY
I wish I could say yes...
Cut To:
CORRIDOR
The alarm rings in the background for a short
while, before stopping. A guard runs past the
door. Suzy cautiously looks around the doorframe
after he passes.
PA
(Distant, Wt echo) Warning.
Emergency fire procedures are now in
force. All security personnel report
to assigned duty stations. This
message will not be repeated.
VAN HOUTEN
(EV) Do you see anything?
SUZY
(EV) No it's clear.
Suzy steps out of the room and is joined moments
later by the others.
MUNTZ
I think this is a bad idea.
OTHERS
(EV) Shut up!
MUNTZ
(EV) Sorry, but I do.
SHOT DOWN CORRIDOR. Blast doors begin dropping
along the length of the corridor. Suzy turns to
face camera as a door drops in front of it.
MUNTZ
The door!
SUZY
(Yells) Quick!
The kids run towards the door. MATCH: OTHER
SIDE, LOW. Suzy and Wiggum manage to roll under
the door just as it closes. MATCH: Suzy’s side.
A loud thump is heard as the other three crash
into the door. Wiggum and Suzy face the door
MUNTZ/VH/POWELL
(Muffled OS) Aaaagh!
WIGGUM
(EV) You guys alright?
VH
(EV) I guess so. How about you?
The metallic click of a gun being cocked is
heard. Wiggum and Suzy turn around.
SUZY
(EV) Well we could probably use a
little help...
Cut To:
WHITE
Strange, distorted voices are heard, though they
cannot be understood. Every so often, a vague
dark shape floats past. After a short while
scene resolves into:
LISA'S VIEW: A laboratory, Olbermann leaning in
close, holding a penlight. Günther is stood in
the background. The voices coalesce into...
OLBERMANN
-act the primary stages should be
almost complete. There, she is
awake.
Olbermann straightens up and walks out of view as
he is speaking.
OLBERMANN
Continue checking her, I will prepare
for that new procedure I've been
wanting to try.
Cut To:
LAB
Looking at Lisa, fairly close, with Günther stood
near her. Lisa is supported on an exam table,
tilted at about 45 degrees. An IV stand is
positioned near the table, with two bags on it.
LISA
(Drowsy) Eugh! Where am I?
Günther opens his mouth.
OLBERMANN
(OS, Snaps) Günther!
GÜNTHER
(Resigned) Yes, Herr Doctor.
Günther lifts Lisa's arm and takes one of the
tubes from the drip. He jabs the needle into
Lisa's arm.
LISA
Oww!
Günther moves away from her and stands by a
computer. Lisa, fully awake now, watches him as
he taps at the keyboard.
GÜNTHER
I know what you are thinking. How
can such a man justify his actions?
LISA
It had crossed my mind...
Günther looks at Lisa.
GÜNTHER
The truth is, I can't. I have no
choice in the matter.
LISA
How can you say-
GÜNTHER
You aren't the only one with an
implant you know.
Olbermann walks back into view.
OLBERMANN
Inform me the moment you are ready.
Then you can leave. The Principal
himself has requested to observe
this.
GÜNTHER
Yes sir.
Olbermann walks out of view again. Günther taps
a few more keys then turns to away from the
keyboard so that his back is to Lisa.
LISA
So that's it. You're just going to
leave? You're practically forcing me
into slave labour! I don’t know how
you can live with yourself!
Günther's head and shoulders sag.
GÜNTHER
Sometimes I ask myself the same
question.
He turns to face Lisa
GÜNTHER
(Continued) But then, without this
place, I wouldn't even exist.
Günther turns and walks away from Lisa, leaving
her looking confused and scared.
Cut To:
CORRIDOR - SIDE SHOT
Two guards are facing WIGGUM and SUZY, pointing
guns at them.
G1
Stay right where you are and don’t
move.
GUARD2 holsters his gun and pulls out a set of
handcuffs.
GUARD2
(To Suzy) Hold out your hands.
SUZY
But he just said-
GUARD1
I know what I said. Just do it. (To
Wiggum) You too.
WIGGUM
(EV) Don’t worry, I’ve got a small
trick or two up my sleeve.
The Guard2 steps up to Suzy and places the
handcuffs on her. Then he steps up to Wiggum,
who is holding her arms out, wrists together in
front of her.
GUARD1
Hey, careful Sarge. These two look
like special ops.
GUARD2
Eh, damn kids! What harm could th-
Uurgh!
A bolt of green Plasma shoots from Wiggum’s
hands, knocking the guard backwards. He smashes
into the other guard and they both sprawl on the
floor.
SUZY
A *small* trick?
WIGGUM
(Shrugs) Eh...
MUNTZ
(EV) Twelve, what’s going on?
WIGGUM
(EV) Nothing. Have you found a way
through?
VAN HOUTEN
(EV) No, and the door’s too thick to
cut.
PA
(VO) Emergency override engaged.
Please stand clear.
The door opens with a loud thump and a hiss. The
kids stare at each other in wonderment.
SUZY
How did you do that?
POWELL
How did... I thought you did it.
WIGGUM
Uh-uh.
PA
(VO Distant) Emergency override
engaged. Please stand clear.
The kids turn and look down the corridor. MATCH:
FROM BEHIND KIDS. A door further down the
corridor opens up.
MUNTZ
Now this is getting weird.
Cut To:
A DARK ROOM
There is a faint glow emanating from somewhere
above the ceiling. A door is opened and LISA is
flung into the room. The door shuts. Lisa
stands up and looks around. She rubs her elbow.
LISA
Much more of this and I won’t have
any bones left to break.
A light beam suddenly strikes Lisa from the
ceiling. She looks up in shock, shielding her
eyes and tries to back out of the light. It
follows her. The rest of the room is plunged
into total darkness.
BURNS
(VO) There’s no use to that you know.
The beam is programmed to follow your
every move.
LISA
What do you want from me!
BURNS
(VO) Oh, nothing really. Just you’re
total loyalty and undying allegiance
to me.
LISA
Well you won’t get it.
BURNS
(VO) So sure? I never said it would
be a voluntary agreement. In fact
you have as little choice in the
matter as anyone in this institute.
LISA
I'd rather die first.
BURNS
(VO) I doubt you would after I'm
finished with you.
The light fades a little and the beam tightens up
around Lisa.
BURNS
(VO) I'm going to subject you to a
little foretaste of what's come
after... life.
The beam fades some more. Lisa looks around the
room, noticing for the first time how dark it is.
The sound of a distant wind becomes audible.
LISA
(SOTTO, Nervous) No need to panic.
He's trying to play tricks on your
mind, to weaken your resolve.
A strange, echoing sound, like something
underwater is heard. Lisa shivers in a sudden
cold.
BURNS
(VO distant) Welcome... to hell.
LISA
(SOTTO, terrified) Don't be
frightened, it's only the dark...
only the dark... Only-
The light shuts off, plunging the room into total
darkness. Lisa screams, her long drawn out cry
echoing in the darkness.
Cut To:
DOOR
Close up on a large security door door.
PA
-stand clear.
The door slides open with a loud thump. Suzy and
the others are stood facing down a corridor, as
if they were walking past the door when it
opened.
POWELL
That's the fifth one! What's doing
this?
SUZY
Maybe it’s just a computer
malfunction.
Suzy looks at the others and shrugs. MATCH:
Along corridor. Suzy walks past the door,
intending to continue down the corridor.
PA
(VO) Warning. Emergency doors
activated. You cannot continue past
this point.
A door slams down in front of Suzy. She jumps
back in surprise.
SUZY
Eeep!
MUNTZ
I think that someone or something is
trying to lead us somewhere.
POWELL
Somehow... The question is who?
Muntz leads the others through the door.
Cut To:
JUNCTION
The kids are walking towards the camera. Suzy
has somehow managed to get some way in front of
the others. They freeze at the sound of two
Guards talking OS.
MUNTZ
(EV, Urgent) Hide!
MUNTZ, WIGGUM, VH and POWELL run back towards a
side door. Suzy, being further ahead, pauses
before diving behind some crates stacked near
camera. She sits with her back to the crates and
curls up. Two Guards walk past the end of the
corridor. Suzy cocks her head to listen, then
creeps forwards and around a corner.
CORNER
SUZY creeps around the corner looking away from
the camera. She turns around and runs stright
into GÜNTHER, knocking him and herself to the
ground.
GÜNTHER SUZY
Gotten Himmel! Waagh!
VAN HOUTEN
(OS, EV) Nine!
Günther attempts to stand as Suzy scrabbles away
from him. Before he can however, the other
children run around the corner. They all trip
over Suzy and land on top of Günther in a tangled
heap.
MUNTZ
(EV) Nine what are you doing!
GÜNTHER
(Muffled) Will all of you please get off
me?
There is a long pause.
POWELL
(EV) Who said that?
VAN-HOUTEN
(EV) I don’t know. (Aloud) Who said
that?
WIGGUM
You idiot, (EV) it’s one of them!
VAN-HOUTEN
(EV) Uh-oh, what do we do now?
Suzy stands up and walks cautiously over to the
pile.
SUZY
Getting off might be a good start.
MUNTZ
But he's one of them! What happens
when we do get off?
GÜNTHER
(Muffled) Why don't you try it and
find out!
The children reluctantly climb off Günther,
backing away from him slowly. He stands up and
brushes himself off.
GÜNTHER
Thank you, I was almost suffocating
under there.
Günther looks at Suzy, who gasps in recognition.
GÜNTHER/SUZY
You!
Suzy leaps at Günther, knocking him over again.
She sits on his front and grabs his collar.
SUZY
You were there when we were
kidnapped! Where’s my sister you
creep!
GÜNTHER
I-I-I-I-
SUZY
Tell me or I’ll force it out of you!
GÜNTHER
But-but you can only s-scan surface
thoughts.
POWELL
Maybe, but I can reach deeper, though
not without causing severe damage.
Günther sags visibly.
GÜNTHER
I do not wish this to continue... I
will help you, but you must get off
me first.
SUZY
Not until you tell me where Lisa is.
GÜNTHER
Unfortunately she is in the Lab...
The kids gasp. Suzy climbs off Günther and helps
him up.
MUNTZ
The lab...
VAN HOUTEN
I’d rather pay a visit to the
Principal!
Suzy looks at Powell, then Günther.
SUZY
Guys...
VAN HOUTEN
Why do I have this irresistible urge
to say Uh-oh?
SUZY
I can't ask you to come any further.
You should try and find a way out of
here.
MUNTZ
No way, we're sticking with you.
POWELL
Yeah!
SUZY
Look, that's nice and all but I
really think you should leave.
GUARD
(OS) I saw them come this way!
MUNTZ
Run!
Suzy and Günther back up the corridor. The
others run across to the other side of the
junction. MATCH: Down corridor. Günther and
Suzy are to the left of the corridor. A guard is
stood down the corridor, waving another guard in.
The other guard carries a huge gun in with him.
GUARD1
What is that?
GUARD2
I don’t know I found it in the
weapons locker.
GUARD1
Think it'll flush em out?
G2 shrugs his shoulders and pulls the trigger. A
massive spiral of energy shoots from the front of
the gun, caving in half the corridor. MATCH:
GÜNTHER/SUZY. Günther grabs Suzy and pulls her
back as the roof collapses in front of them.
GUARD1
(OS) Oh great! That's just perfect!
Not only did you manage to loose
them, but you also destroyed half the
Institute as well! If this comes out
of my pay-check, you’re a dead man!
GUARD2
(OS) Sorry.
Suzy gets up and walks towards the rubble. She
starts pulling huge boulders out of the debris,
tossing them behind her until she reaches a
massive piece of twisted metal.
GÜNTHER
What's the matter?
SUZY
Not even I could shift that! (EV)
Four! I can't get through to you.
MUNTZ
(OS, EV) I can imagine. I guess
we'll have to find another way
around.
SUZY
(EV) No! You should get out of here.
Suzy scampers off down the corridor, trailing
Günther behind her.
MUNTZ
(OS, EV) Um... right. (Pause) Nine?
Nine?
Cut To:
SUZY and GÜNTHER towards a largish security door.
As they pass it slides open. The room behind it
is almost pitch black.
SUZY
It's happened again...
Cut To:
INSIDE THE ROOM.
Facing S and G, who are framed in the doorway.
Suzy steps forwards.
SUZY
Hello?
Quiet footsteps recede into the room. Suzy and
Günther look around, trying to determine the
source.
LISA
(OS) Go away!
SUZY
Lisa!
MATCH: LISA'S VIEW. From above, strangely
distorted like in "Predator". SUZY and GÜNTHER
are surrounded by a strange red glow. They are
both still glancing around the room.
SUZY
Lisa, where are you?
GÜNTHER
I'm going to try something.
Cut To:
PREVIOUS SHOT
Günther looks around, then up at the ceiling
slightly.
GÜNTHER
Lights on!
LISA
(OS) No!
Lights flicker on around the room. Suzy glances
up to her right and freezes in shock. She grabs
Günther's arm and points to where she is looking.
GÜNTHER
What?
Günther looks. MATCH: SIDE VIEW. LISA is sat in
the corner of the ceiling. She is wearing a
black jump suit. MATCH: CLOSE LISA. She is
shielding her face with her arm. Her pupils have
reduced to tiny catlike slits.
MATCH: ALL THREE. Lisa crawls across the ceiling
with lightening speed (Almost lizard-like) then
drops down near the far wall.
SUZY
Lisa it's me! Suzy!
LISA
But you can't be real! Nothing's
real anymore!
SUZY
But Lisa!
Lisa seems to melt into the wall.
GÜNTHER
Where did she go?
SUZY
I wish I- WAAAGH!
Lisa re-appears directly behind Suzy, with her
hand on Suzy's shoulder. Her eyes are closed.
Suzy spins around to face her.
LISA
I'm sorry... I had to make sure you
were really you.
SUZY
What have they done to you?!
Lisa opens her eyes; her pupils are normal for a
moment before returning to their catlike state.
She sighs.
PA
(VO) I think I'd better explain that.
SUZY
Who said that?
PA (SARAH)
(VO) I did. My name is Sarah; I'm
the Institutes central computer.
LISA
She's also Maggie's twin sister.
SUZY
Maggie's twin?!? (To Günther) But you
said Maggie didn't have a twin.
GÜNTHER
She didn't! I'm sure of it.
SARAH
(VO) Then explain me wise guy. Right
now I'm just a brain in a jar because
of you people.
LISA
Excuse me, but shouldn't we be trying
to escape?
SARAH
(VO) Oh, right.
A door opens in the far wall.
SARAH
(VO) I'm sure your "friend" can guide
you to the main lab.
All three walk through the door, which closes a
moment later.
Cut To:
CORRIDOR - LATER
This corridor is wider and darker than the others
are. Every so often there is a flashing red
light set into the wall. GÜNTHER, LISA and SUZY
are walking down the middle of the corridor.
Lisa hangs back from the other two.
LISA
So what's it like being a computer?
SARAH
(VO) Eh, it's not so bad. I'm not
really sure if I would be able to
explain it without some common frame
of reference though.
LISA
Try me.
SARAH
(V) Well... I can pretty much do
whatever I want. I have an almost
unlimited mental capacity.
SUZY
(SOTTO) And an ego to match.
LISA
That would explain one or two things.
Like how you can talk, but Maggie
can't.
SARAH
(VO) I have had a whole year.
LISA
Eh...
GÜNTHER
This is the door.
Günther taps a code into the access panel at the
side of the door. There is a Trek like buzzing
noise and the panel recedes into the wall.
GÜNTHER
Gott! The codes have changed.
SARAH
(VO) Hold on a second.
There is a string of beeping noises followed by a
sharp buzz.
SARAH
(VO) Sorry, the security systems for
that area aren't linked into my own.
I can't get in either.
SUZY
There has to be some way in!
Lisa looks up towards the ceiling. MATCH: FROM
BELOW. There is an air vent high up near the
ceiling.
LISA
There is.
MATCH: SIDE VIEW
SUZY
But you can barely control your
abilities!
As if to prove her point, Lisa's suit fades away,
leaving just her head and hands floating in the
air. The suit fades back in again a moment
later.
LISA
If you can think of a better way I'd
like to hear it.
Without waiting for an answer Lisa steps up to
the wall and begins climbing. MATCH: BELOW.
Lisa reaches the air vent and struggles inside.
She pops her head out and gives a thumbs up.
Cut To:
INSIDE VENT
LISA crawls into the vent towards the camera.
Her pupils dilate until they look almost normal.
MATCH: LISA'S VIEW The picture cycles from a
normal view to infrared, then to an "enhanced
light" image (Everything looks green). MATCH:
PREVIOUS. Lisa cocks her head.
LISA
That's new.
Lisa continues to crawl along the vent.
LISA
Now if I can just figure where I'm
going...
SARAH
(EV) Lisa?
Lisa bangs her head against the roof in surprise.
LISA
Owww! What the- Sarah? Is that
you?
SARAH
(EV) Yes. I wanted to wait until you
were alone.
LISA
Why?
Lisa begins crawling again.
SARAH
(EV) So I could tell you what you
were designed for.
LISA
You've already told me, I'm some sort
of super-spy.
SARAH
(EV) You can operate in that
capacity, yes. But your primary
function is as an assassin.
Lisa stops again.
LISA
A what?!
SARAH
(EV) Think about it. You're perfect
for the job. You can get into
practically anywhere undetected, you
don’t have any fingerprints to leave
behind and you have those little
venom sacs under your fingernails.
Lisa kneels and looks at her hands
LISA
I do? But, but I can't kill anyone,
it's not in my nature.
SARAH
A few more sessions in "hell" and
your nature wouldn't have mattered at
all.
Lisa resumes crawling
LISA
I wouldn’t have believed even Burns
would stoop that low.
Lisa crawls around a corner and finds herself
underneath a metal grille. She kneels and gently
pushes at the grille in an attempt to open it.
SARAH
(EV) You might want to hold onto
something.
LISA
Why-yyyyyyyaaaahg!
Lisa appears to shoot up through the grille.
Cut To:
AIR VENT
Lisa seems to be hanging upwards from the vent.
SPIN AROUND to show that she is in fact hanging
high above a laboratory.
SARAH
(EV) Well, you're upside down for a
start.
LISA
(Neutral) Thanks for the warning.
Lisa swings up and sticks herself to the vent.
Cut To:
LAB
Lisa crawls down the wall crouches and looks
around the room. MATCH: LABORATORY. Most of the
room is draped in shadow, with just a few spots
brightly lit. One of these is a security console
where a solitary GUARD sits, looking extremely
bored. Around the room are several large
workbenches, piled high with various bits of
scientific equipment. Lisa cautiously makes her
way between the benches.
MATCH: CLOSE LISA. As she passes one of the
benches she spots a small animal in a cage. She
moves closer to see what it is. The animal,
which appears to be a small mouse, begins
scurrying around the cage as she approaches.
Lisa puts her hand on the cage and the mouse
stops, quivering. Then it leaps up at her making
some very unmouse-like noises.
LISA
Yaagh!
Lisa staggers back, wheeling her arms. She
knocks some of the equipment from the bench
behind her, which drops to the floor with a loud
crash. MATCH: GUARD. The guard looks up in
surprise. He stands up, picks up a torch and
begins looking around the room. MATCH: LISA.
Lisa is cowering behind the bench. The guard
appears behind the bench, playing the torch
around the room. Lisa quietly crawls along the
base of the bench towards a shadowed area of the
room. MATCH: GUARD. The guard walks towards the
same area as Lisa just went to, shining his torch
left and right. He points the torch straight
into the shadows illuminating Lisa and an
extremely large red pipe (At least a meter in
diameter). Lisa shields her eyes in the sudden
glare.
GUARD
Okay freeze! Wha-
Lisa fades away as the guard goes for his gun.
He freezes in shock and looks around. MATCH:
FROM ABOVE. Lisa re-appears, clinging to the
pipe, facing down towards the guard. The guard
spins around and looks into the room, trying to
find Lisa. MATCH: LISA'S FACE. Her eyes narrow.
MATCH: GUARD. The guard looks up when he hears a
screeching hiss. Lisa drops down on top of him.
She raises her left arm. A set of claw's about
one half-inch long pop out from the end of her
fingers.
GUARD
No!
Lisa slashes at the guard's face, knocking him
down. He struggles and shakes for a second
before lying still. Lisa backs of him,
hyperventilating.
LISA
What have I done?
SARAH
(VO) You've killed him that’s what.
LISA
I couldn't stop myself.
SARAH
(VO) It's an automatic response.
There's no way you can stop it.
LISA
I’m a monster...
SARAH
(VO) You can worry about that later.
Right now I think you should let the
others in.
Lisa slowly backs away from the guard's body,
then turns and runs towards the door.
Cut To:
CORRIDOOR
SUZY and GÜNTHER are here. The door opens and
LISA almost falls out of it in her haste to exit.
Günther grabs Lisa and stops her from actually
falling.
SUZY
Lisa! Are you alright?
LISA
(Panting) Yeah I... yeah.
Cut To:
LABORATORY - COMPUTER CONSOLE
GÜNTHER, SUZY and LISA all stand around the
console. Günther begins typing on the keyboard.
GÜNTHER
I'm trying to link Sarah into the
computer... ah there we go.
SARAH
(VO) What's this? I've never seen
these files before.
SUZY
(To Lisa) Okay, now it's time to find
some way of changing you back.
LISA
I wonder how much different I'll
feel...
GÜNTHER
The nano-molecular induction chamber
is over there.
SUZY
So?
GÜNTHER
That's the device we used to change
her.
SARAH
(VO) What's this nano-inductor doo-
hickey you're all talking about.
GÜNTHER
Read the files. Oh, and Sarah? Can
you set up a private audio channel on
this terminal? There's something I
want to talk to you about
Cut To:
NANO-CHAMBER
Suzy and Lisa stand by a large, black sphere with
a control panel built into the side.
LISA
Now, how do we use this thing?
SUZY
Why don't we ask Sarah?
LISA
Okay.
Both girls look around the room for a moment.
LISA
How?
SARAH
(VO) By talking to me you klutz!
SUZY
Oh, I... how do we activate this
thing?
SARAH
(VO) The nano-chamber? It's a very
simple process really, although it
involves a lot of steps to achieve
the-
SUZY
You don't know, do you.
SARAH
(VO) Not as such, no. I'm reading up
on it right now actually.
There is a long pause, then several trek-like
bleeping noises are heard.
SARAH
(VO) Ah-ha!
LISA
Can you tell us now?
SARAH
(VO) I can do one better. Tell me
what you want and I'll interface
directly with the chamber.
SUZY
We want Lisa back the way she was.
The chamber door pops open.
SARAH
(VO) Climb in.
Lisa hesitates.
LISA
I'm not so sure about this.
SUZY
What's wrong now?
LISA
Well it's like, I've been in there
before and it wasn't exactly nice
then.
SUZY
And you're saying that this time you
know what's coming so you don't want
to go back.
LISA
No, I... I just...
SARAH
(VO) Will you just get in the thing!
Lisa cautiously climbs inside the chamber. The
door hisses shut behind her and seals her in.
Cut To:
INSIDE THE CHAMBER
LISA stands in the middle of the chamber. There
is just enough room for her to spread her arms
(She doesn't though). The only lights are set
into the floor, casting an eerie glow around the
interior.
SARAH
(VO) Okay, the chamber's going to be
flooding in a few moments-
LISA
What!
SARAH
(VO) It's a breathable liquid.
You'll be fine, trust me.
LISA
Where have I heard that one before?
SARAH
(VO) You might feel a little anxiety
at first, just try not to talk under
there.
A pink liquid begins rushing into the chamber.
Lisa backs up against the wall. The chamber
fills up to knee height.
LISA
I've changed my mind! I want to get
out!
SARAH
(VO) Sorry no can do. The fluid
can't be released until the chamber's
full.
A second valve in the roof opens, completely
filling the chamber. Lisa spins around in the
current, holding her breath and trying to find
some air.
SARAH
(VO, Muffled) You have to let it go
Lisa.
LISA
(With much bubble blowing) Mmmf!
Lisa finally lets her breath out in an explosion
of bubbles. The bubbles swirl around the chamber
and disappear towards the top. Lisa panics and
begins thrashing around until she realises she's
still breathing.
SARAH
(VO, Muffled) There, that wasn't so
bad now, was it? Now, you can't talk
but you can communicate with me via
the link.
LISA
(EV) You make it sound as if there's
something bad coming.
SARAH
(VO, Muffled) Whatever gave you that
idea?
Cut To:
OUTSIDE
SUZY looks up as several bangs come from the
chamber.
SUZY
Is she alright in there?
SARAH
(VO) She's fine, just give her a
couple of minutes and she'll be back
to normal... that's funny.
SUZY
What's funny?
SARAH
(VO) Someone just... no, never mind.
Suzy opens the chamber and Lisa staggers weakly
out.
SUZY
You okay?
Lisa nods mutely, too exhausted to speak. She
examines herself a little.
LISA
(Weak) Did it work?
SARAH
(VO) It'll be a while before any real
changes take place. These things
aren't that fast y'know.
SUZY
Okay it's my turn now.
SARAH
(VO) There might be a problem with
that. The chamber takes a while to
reset itself before... what! No!
GÜNTHER
(OS) Ach schwinen!
There is a loud explosion. Günther walks up to
Lisa and Suzy, cursing quietly.
SUZY
What happened?
GÜNTHER
We have to find another console.
Your "friend" Sarah just blew up that
one.
SARAH
(VO) And I'll keep doing it if you
try that again!
LISA
Try what?
SARAH
(VO) He was-
GÜNTHER
Nothing. Now let's find that
computer.
SUZY
I'll try over here.
Suzy walks towards the same large red pipe that
Lisa had left earlier. Lisa runs in front of her
and blocks her way.
LISA
No wait, I think you should try
somewhere else.
Suzy tries to see past Lisa, who moves to block
her view.
SUZY
Lisa what's wrong with you?
LISA
Umm. Oh look, there's one over there.
Lisa points to the other side of the room. Suzy
looks where she is pointing, then back at Lisa.
SUZY
Why won’t you let me past?
BURNS
(OS) Because there’s something your
"sister" doesn’t want you to see.
BURNS and SMITHERS step out from the shadows.
Lisa and Suzy look at him in shock.
BURNS
Isn’t that right forty-two.
SUZY
Lisa what’s he talking about? Lisa?
Lisa is staring at Burns and makes no response to
Suzy.
BURNS
She can’t hear you. Normally I would
prefer my subjects to operate of
their own volition, but even the most
docile can occasionally turn nasty.
Burns looks straight at Günther, who hangs his
head. DOCTOR OLBERMANN walks up behind Burns.
BURNS
So, as an extra insurance of total
co-operation, I had forty-two here
fitted with a remote control device.
Burns pulls a remote from his pocket and pushes a
button. Lisa takes a deep breath and flexes her
hands. MATCH: CLOSE BEHIND LISA. Lisa looks
over her shoulder, her face blank. Her
unblinking eyes have turned a silvery colour.
She turns and faces Suzy with a leer, tilting her
head slightly to one side.
SUZY
Lisa?
Burns and co walk up behind Lisa, who is still
staring at Suzy with a blank expression.
BURNS
As you can see, she is completely
within my thrall. In fact she now
believes that everything I tell her
is the truth.
Burns presses another button and Lisa steps
towards Suzy. She lifts her arm slightly,
unsheathing the claws in her fingers. Suzy backs
away from her into the wrecked computer console.
Lisa swings at Suzy, who ducks under her arm,
avoiding the claws. Suzy dodges to one side and
runs around the back of the console. They both
slowly circle the console, eyeing each other
warily.
SUZY
Lisa listen to me. You have to fight
this.
LISA
Fight what?
Lisa takes a swing at Suzy, who ducks.
SUZY
The unrelenting urge to kill me for
one thing. Lisa this is wrong!
Can't you see that?
LISA
No! It's you who cannot see!
Nothing has ever been as clear as it
is now. Why can't you understand?
SUZY
That isn't you talking, it's just
programming. You have to fight it
Lisa!
Lisa vaults over the console and lands on Suzy,
knocking her to the ground. She raises her hand
again as if to strike, but then hesitates. She
grimaces as if in pain and her arm wavers a
little.
LISA
No!
Suzy wriggles out from under her sister and
stands in front of her. Lisa drops her arm and
cradles it with her other. She sobs a little.
Burns walks up behind her.
BURNS
What are you doing!
Suzy turns and faces Burns defiantly.
SUZY
It's over, and you've failed.
MATCH: BURNS. He grins evilly and holds up the
controller.
BURNS
Not quite.
He pushes a single button on the device. MATCH:
SUZY. She looks at him curiously. Then her eyes
widen in shock.
SUZY
Aagh!!
Suzy falls forwards. Lisa is stood behind her.
Her eyes are completely black, and her face is
totally devoid of emotion. She stands over Suzy.
MATCH: ALL.
BURNS
Excellent. (To Olbermann) She's
passed every test.
SUZY
(Moans)
BURNS
Should she be alive?
OLBERMANN
(Puzzled) No. The dose administered
would have killed an elephant.
There is a loud explosion and Lisa is blasted
backwards by a green plasma bolt. Burns and
Olbermann turn to face the explosion. MATCH:
BLASTED DOOR. WIGGUM and MUNTZ are stood in the
doorway.
BURNS
(To Olbermann) Uh... Doctor remind me
to congratulate what's left of you
when this is over (Pause). Ta-ta.
Burns and Smithers run from the room, dropping
the controller as they go. It smashes on the
floor in a shower of sparks. Suzy, her strength
returning, manages to push herself into a sitting
position just as WIGGUM and MUNTZ run up to her.
WIGGUM
(EV) Nine who was that?
SUZY
(EV) My sister.
MUNTZ
(EV) Talk about sibling rivalry.
Suzy stands unsteadily and makes her way towards
Lisa. She is slumped against the wall. Suzy
quickens her pace and kneels besides her sister,
picking up her hand.
SUZY
Lisa?
Lisa stirs and opens her eyes. Her pupils are
nearly normal.
LISA
Oh, my head. I blacked out. What
happened?
Lisa looks at Suzy curiously.
SUZY
It's best you don't know. We have to
get out of here... what?
LISA
My eyes. I can see normally again!
It worked!
Suzy and Wiggum help Lisa to her feet. The cloth
over her chest and abdomen is burned and
tattered. Lisa looks down at herself then at the
others.
WIGGUM
My fault, sorry.
LISA
I don't think it as bad as it - aah!
Lisa nearly collapses in pain but is caught by
Wiggum and Suzy.
SUZY
Where's the other three?
MUNTZ
Out there somewhere. I couldn't
leave you down here and Twelve here
wouldn't let me go alone.
They make their way towards the exit.
OLBERMANN
(OS) Not so fast.
Olbermann walks up behind them holding his own
controller. They turn and face him.
OLBERMANN
There is no escape for you. In my
hands I hold your very lives, and
there’s nothing you can do about it.
GÜNTHER
(OS) I wouldn’t be so sure.
Günther steps up beside Olbermann and holds a gun
to his head.
OLBERMANN
Günther?
Olbermann turns and looks at Günther.
OLBERMANN
I expected this would happen, as soon
as you started talking to (spits the
word) them! The same applies to you
also, you know.
GÜNTHER
If I remember correctly, the shock
from that thing produces a sever
spasm in it’s victim.
Günther hefts the gun slightly, as if to prove a
point. He leans in close to Olbermann.
GÜNTHER
You kill me, and you die as well.
Günther backs away from Olbermann, still pointing
the gun at him.
GÜNTHER
(To Suzy) I need you to enter this
sequence into the computer.
Günther whispers into Suzy's ear.
SUZY
What will that do?
GÜNTHER
Just enter the code.
Wiggum and Muntz take Lisa from Suzy, who walks
over to the computer and types in the code.
SARAH
(VO) No! You said you wouldn't!
GÜNTHER
There is no choice Sarah. (To Suzy)
You and the others must leave now.
SUZY
What about you?
GÜNTHER
NOW!
Suzy looks at him in shock. She slowly backs
away from him towards Lisa and, supporting her,
makes her way out of the room followed by Wiggum
and Muntz.
This is madness Günther. Why not
just give this up, we can forget it
and carry on.
GÜNTHER
No Hans, we cannot. Sarah! Initiate
command.
SARAH
(VO) Command initiated.
OLBERMANN
Günther! What...?
SARAH
(VO) Final sequence engaged.
Transfer protocols engaged. Ten
seconds.
GÜNTHER
Good bye, Hans.
Cut To:
HILLSIDE
SUZY, who is still supporting LISA, MUNTZ and
WIGGUM make their way up the hill. Lisa is
barely conscious but is becoming more aware of
her surroundings. Suzy, however, is becoming
increasingly disoriented and is showing signs of
fatigue. Behind them the silhouette of the SNPP
rises into the night. They stop for a brief
rest.
LISA
(Weak) I always wondered what those
block-houses where for. Not even Dad
was allowed-
A cluster of buildings at the base of the nearest
cooling tower erupts in a towering explosion.
Alarms begin sounding all over the plant and the
employees pour out of the emergency exits.
SUZY
Boom... (Giggles inanely)
WIGGUM
That was the only home I ever had.
Wiggum looks at Suzy, who now looks exhausted.
WIGGUM
We need to get you to a medical
facility...
SUZY
Hossp-pital.
MUNTZ
Whatever.
Muntz and Wiggum help Lisa and Suzy to their feet
and carry on up the hill.
Cut To:
HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM
The room is fairly busy, with all kinds of people
going about their business. Two nurses, one male
one female, are stood near the door talking. The
Male nurse looks a lot like George Clooney and is
propositioning the female nurse when the doors
burst open and SUZY drags LISA into the room.
Everyone stops and looks at Suzy as she gasps and
collapses onto the floor.
Cut To:
HOSPITAL WARD
A girl (L1) is lying in a bed, unconscious. She
has several machines attached to her, making
various beeping and hissing noises. She has a
bandage on her shoulder, around her chest and
another one on her head. Sat beside the bed is
L2, wearing a night gown. Her head is also
bandaged, as are her arms and upper body. She is
holding L1's hand. They are LISA and SUZY,
though which is which is anyone’s guess.
Cut To:
The other end of the ward. DR HIBBERT is stood
talking with HOMER and MARGE, who is holding
MAGGIE in one hand. She looks extremely haggard
and her hair is a mess. She toys with a lock of
hair above her brow, trying to keep it in place.
BART is stood next to her, looking up at Hibbert.
Marge keeps glancing down the ward at the girls.
HIBBERT
-in a coma. For the time being she's
comfortable, but if she makes it
through the night it'll be a miracle.
The other girl... she'll be very
tired for a while, but she seems
fine.
MARGE
(Tense) They have names Doctor, why
don't you use them!
HIBBERT
Well they look so alike I couldn't
possibly know which was which.
(Chuckles)
MARGE
Why didn't you just ask them?
HIBBERT
We thought of that. The one who is
conscious doesn't seem to know who
she is and for obvious reasons we
couldn't ask the other girl. Maybe
you should talk to her.
Cut To:
GIRLS
>From behind L2. Marge’s shadow falls over L2 as
Marge walks up behind her. L2 looks around
slowly, her eyes filled with pain and confusion.
L2
I-I...don’t... Who... who am I?
MATCH: SIDE VIEW. Marge tugs at her hair again.
She places Maggie onto the bed and sits beside
L2.
MARGE
Do you know who I am?
L2
You’re my... my mom?
MARGE
You remember me!
HOMER
What about me, do you remember me?
L2
Of course I remember you dad, you
took me to the last baseball...
game...
CLOSE HOMER/MARGE
HOMER
I did? Marge which one did I take?
MARGE
You took them both Homer.
HOMER
So which one does that make her?
MARGE
I don't know Homer, I just don't
know. (To L2) Do you remember this?
Marge reaches into her hair and pulls out Lisa’s
pearl necklace.
L2(LISA)
(Gasps) My pearls! They’re my
pearls! Mom I remember...
LISA looks at Homer and Marge then turns back to
L1.
LISA
Suzy...
CLOSE LISA
Three-quarter shot. She stares blankly across at
SUZY (OS).
F.LISA
It took me almost a week to remember
everything... and there are still
things I'm not sure of, even now.
FADE TO:
F.LISA, in exactly the same pose. She looks
extremely sad. MAGGIE is sat right next to her
and has her hand on Lisa's shoulder. MATT stands
behind Lisa and puts his hand on her back.
MATCH: BART/JESSIE, FROM BEHIND. Lisa can be
seen between and behind them. Bart rubs the back
of his neck and looks at Jessie. MATCH: WHOLE
ROOM.
LISA
Mom spent the next two days with
Suzy, right up to when she died. It
was just too much for her to take...
Suzy never woke up (Distraught) and I
never even got to say goodbye.
Lisa leans into Matt's arm and cries her heart
out.
MATT
(Comforting) Hey hey... It's okay
Lis...
JESSIE
Oh my g**! Jane!
BART
What about her?
Jessie turns to Bart.
JESSIE
Günther said that all the Simpson
women have twins. What about Jane's-
LISA
(Recovering) She, (sniff) she didn't
have one.
MATT
She's right. I had to watch the
whole thing.
Lisa smiles weakly.
LISA
I had to feel it, remember?
MATT
Watching is enough for me.
LISA
Coward.
BART
Umm... Lis? There’s one thing I’ve
been meaning to ask. You’ve been
telling us this as you remember it,
but as far as I recall, Suzy never
told you what happened to her.
LISA
What’s your point Bart?
BART
How could you know?
LISA
Well I... that is she... (Quiet)
Oh...
Lisa stands up and walks from the room.
MATT
Lis?
The door slams.
MATT
What’s gotten into her?
Cut To:
LISA’S/MATT’S ROOM
LISA enters the room and runs to the mirror. She
starts frantically pulling at her hair, trying to
see her scalp. She parts her hair and reveals a
blue streak running through it, which peters out
about an inch away from her head. Her hands drop
to her sides and she straightens up slowly as
MATT rushes into the room.
MATT
Lisa what’s wrong?
LISA
(Quiet) I must have absorbed her
memories!
Lisa turns her head towards him slightly, her
brow furrowed in concentration.
MATT
Lisa?
Cut To:
CEMETERY
>From behind a tombstone. Lisa walks slowly up to
a tomb. She stands in front of the stone for a
moment.
CLOSE LISA
She leans forwards and lays a bunch of flowers on
the tomb, then straightens up and steps back.
She stands in silence for a while.
LISA
I... I don’t really know where to
start. I guess I should have visited
more often... but with the teaching
job, and then congress and the
Senate... (Suddenly upset) None of
it belongs to me. It’s like my whole
life was a lie... all of it. Matt,
the kids... none of it’s really mine.
(Pause) And I’m not me... you’re me.
I should be the one lying in that
grave, not you! I-
Lisa wipes her eyes.
LISA
I guess what I’m trying to say is;
I’m sorry.
MATT
(OS) Lis, you okay?
Lisa stands and stares at the tombstone. Matt
walks up beside her. He puts his hand on her
shoulder and looks at her face. Lisa bites her
lip.
MATT
Lisa-
LISA
Lisa’s dead.
MATT
She wasn’t last time I looked.
(Pause) If Lisa’s dead, what does
that make you?
LISA
A fraud, a thief and a liar.
MATT
Come again?
LISA
My life... *Lisa's* life ended
twenty-three years ago in that
hospital.
MATT
Lisa what are you talking about?
LISA
Matt I'm not Lisa! I stole her life!
MATT
No you didn't.
LISA
Yes I did!
MATT
Lisa look at me.
Lisa looks at Matt. He takes hold of her hands
MATT
Think about it. You didn’t steal
anyone's life. It’s your life and
you made it what it is. You’re the
same woman I married eleven years
ago, you’re still the same woman I
love now and there is nothing in this
world that can change that.
Lisa looks away again, staring at the tombstone.
LISA
But I'm still not Lisa.
MATT
Yes, you are. The Lisa I know is both
those girls combined; a unique
individual with all the thoughts
feelings and memories of Lisa AND
Suzy. Just because you use one name
or the other doesn't make any
difference.
LISA
I guess... Oh Matt I miss her.
MATT
I know honey, but as long as you
remember her here, (points to her
head) and here (points to her heart)
she'll always be with you. Now, you
ready?
LISA
(Upset) Mm-hmm.
They both turn and walk away from the stone.
TOMBSTONE
Pan slowly down.
The flowers lie against the stone underneath an
inscription. “In memory of Susanna Jane Simpson.
Beloved daughter, Sister and Friend”. A small
card rests on the flowers, upon which a single
word, “Lisa”, is written.
THE END